Overcoming First Day Jitters and Anxiety

First Day #Anxiety Is Real

     My heart is racing, my palms are sweating, my stomach is churning, and my head is pounding yet floating simultaneously. The lights are too bright and everything is too loud. For me, anxiety is a hereditary characteristic I've had the joy of overcoming since childhood. Sometimes, it appears unannounced on a random Monday and sticks around for a while. Most of the time, anxiety makes its debut according to new developments in my life.

    I am so grateful for the opportunity to work with The Digital Summer Clinic and Intermode this summer! Unfortunately, that excitement didn't nullify the nervous energy that coursed through me the closer I got to the first day of my internship. These conflicting emotions set me on edge and clouded my mind for days. 

    In a bittersweet way, I'm glad that I've had to spend so much time with anxiety because it's given me years to practice how to deal with it. Here are some of the skills I've learned:

1. Cope First

    Before doing anything, take care of yourself. Most people cannot function at full capacity when in a state of panic and uncertainty. The best way I've ever heard it phrased is, "We just need to get you through this moment." Even if you're good at hiding your emotions from others and able to carry out tasks in their eyes, it is important to be able to function and think clearly because you are important. Life is all about balance so it only makes sense to follow what we perceive as negative emotions with positive ones. 

    Everyone copes in different ways and I use many strategies to do so. I often need to start by mindlessly scrolling through social media to get my thoughts to slow down. Once my mind isn't running a million miles per hour I'm then able to work on more healing techniques or things that feed my soul. Some examples for me include:

• Breathe, I know this sounds so cliche but bear with me. This refers to much more than your typical breath rhythm, it is an intentional and focused process to help you physically and psychologically. There are a variety of patterns to follow such as square breathing, 4-7-8 breathing, and pursed lips breathing. The image from ProjectXFactor explains how to do the exercises well. My favorite thing about breathing exercises is that you can practice them at any time. They're beneficial in a crisis when you're hyperventilating but also refreshing and grounding on any given day.
• Reading and Writing, this doesn't necessarily mean journaling! Reading books by your favorite author, your go-to manga series, or creating your own story are all great ways to focus your energy on something healthy. Journaling felt extremely forced, almost formal when I first tried it. My life changed when I stopped putting myself in constraints of 'what I'm supposed to do' and let myself do what felt best.
• Arts and crafts, I am not the most artistic person in the world by any means but I am highly creative. Similar to reading and writing, I find being creative to be soothing and freeing. 
• Sensory exercises, our senses are extremely powerful which can be a good thing and a bad one. Sensory overload sucks and can hit you like a bus. When you're in a new environment, one of the best things you can do to avoid sensory overload is to familiarize yourself with the area. One of my favorite ways to do this is the 5-to-1 exercise which uses all of your senses. I try to adapt the order according to my environment but here's an example:
• Name 5 things you can see
• Name 4 things you can touch
• Name 3 things you can hear
• Name 2 things you can smell
• Name 1 thing you can taste

2. Use Logic

    I cannot use logic correctly when I'm anxious. This sounds funny but what I mean is that my anxiety hijacks me to the point where 'logic' will justify the irrational thoughts I'm experiencing. Once I've used some of the skills to cope and have calmed down, I'm able to analyze my questions and weigh them against reality.

    What if the people at the company hate me? What if my internship partner/coworker/other students hate me? What if I'm not the right fit? What if I screw up? What if I forget something? What if...? What if...?

    I could certainly go on but let's start here. First, remember that you are human. And the cool thing is that they're just people, too! You are allowed to make mistakes because you're not a supercomputer. If you happen to make a mistake, the important part is what you do afterward. As long as you try, you are doing something right and most people will recognize your effort in a positive light. Not to mention it's your first day! This is your time to learn how things work. If they expected you to know everything already then you'd be in a different position.

    Also, conflict is a normal part of life; but what reason would these people have to dislike you when they don't even know you yet? (Don't let yourself go down that rabbit hole, we're still working through this part.) You have every right to be here. You earned this spot. You are so incredible but just aren't seeing it right now. It can be so hard to see your worth when coming out of a panicked or nervous head space.

    What else can I do to ease my mind? I can prepare!

3. Prepare

    Prepare, prepare, and prepare. In the simplest of terms, the more prepared you are the less you have to worry about. In any given situation there should be at least some information available. If you're new to campus, take the time to walk your schedule before the semester starts. If you're starting a new job, visit the building you'll be working at so you know exactly how to get there. Most jobs have an orientation period and that's a great time to get associated with your surroundings. Here are some of the things I did to prepare for my internship:

• Research, as soon as information was released, I researched the company I'd be working for. I looked up their website, the social media accounts of the company, and looked at the LinkedIn profiles of their founders. I wanted to know this place inside and out before even stepping foot through the front door.
• Connect, one of the biggest sources of my anxiety is people. Once my partner and a supervisor had been announced I emailed them both individually to introduce myself. Getting their response and starting a conversation through a screen put my mind at ease. 
• Schedule, having a planner has saved my sanity throughout my academic career. When I start a job, I like to write down my scheduled days and hours so I can adjust my daily life accordingly. Depending on your job, having a planner can help plot out your projects and meetings. 

    It's important to remember that no one is perfect, even perfectionists. Perfectionism is a beast to tackle another day. We can prepare until Hell freezes over and still encounter things we had not thought about. I am an overthinker and come up with some wild scenarios but life always throws something different than what I was anticipating.

4. Be Receptive

    Now we're approaching the building on the first day itself. Steps 1-3 can absolutely be referred to on the day of as well. Cope in whatever way is healthiest for you, cross-check your thoughts with reality to give yourself a clear picture, and prepare yourself for the day. Something I had to learn is that one of the best ways to prepare is to be receptive. 

    Opening yourself up to new things can be challenging. Sometimes we get stuck in our ways and are too stubborn to change our habits. Humans are creatures of habit and pattern so it makes sense that we'd be hesitant to accept anything that goes against our typical way of life. 

    Everyone has a different way of thinking, has different methods for accomplishing goals, and is knowledgeable of different things than you. When you're new to any situation, it's a great opportunity to let the people who have been there for a while help. They can guide you, offer instruction, and give you tips and tricks. 

    More often than not, they want to see you succeed as much as you do! No one wants to do someone else's job for them. When everyone does their job well, it means less work overall. Who can argue with that?

5. One Step at a Time

    Congratulations, you made it through the first day! Now you can repeat these steps as much as you want until you're comfortable or until they are ingrained into your everyday life. Ultimately, do what is best for you. Whatever helps you get through the day, as long as you're safe, is good enough. You are good enough.

    One last phrase for this post, I swear, "Baby steps still move forward." No matter how small consider your progress, it's still progress! If all you did today was learn something new, you did something great. Enjoy your small victories as they come because they are leading you to a huge one.

Summary

    Whether you're preparing for your first day of high school, college, an internship, or a job, it is perfectly normal to have nervous jitters or to be anxious. Change can be scary, anticipation can be overwhelming, and stress can be crippling. Thankfully, there are ways to overcome these big feelings.

1. Cope. Take care of yourself so that you're able to do what you've worked so hard for.
2. Use Logic. Challenge your anxious thoughts by checking in with the reality of the situation. Approach the thoughts and questions with a clear head.
3. Prepare. Do this for as long as it takes to feel ready. You can never be too prepared!
4. Be Receptive. Open yourself up to new concepts and useful advice.
5. One Step at a Time. Take each day, hour, and minute one at a time and you'll be just fine!

    There are a ton of resources out there, which is great, but sometimes too many choices can make it harder to actually use them. A friend of mine recommended the Finch app which is available on Google Play and the Apple Store. (I have four more friendship slots so the first people to use my invite code 12ER5LYAJH will get 600 Rainbow Stones!) I have loved using this app because it allows me to set goals, reflect on life, and has a section called First Aid. In this area is a connection to help lines and tools to help you through intense moments. This app is a great way to use these 5 steps and tackle anything life throws at you. The good, the bad, and the ugly.

-The Adaptive Creative